hm....
So today I think I ventured to open myself up more to people i still consider strangers even if Ive now known them for quite some months. I talked to someone today and I quite enjoyed the forty minute conversation.
I feel awkward and somewhat left out of earlier friendships and maybe even recent ones. Most of them are on their way to internships or study abroad and yet I am in houston doing nothing really and feeling odd. GT is preparing for law school and many others are content in what they're going to do like this really cool guy I know is going to backpack in Europe for the summer, he knows no one there except a distant uncle in Germania and the dude is going there all by himself to experience these new things that come with growing a year older. And in all my happiness I hate feeling down and wishing that was me crap, im unfulfilled, but then again it gives me this thing I think I can call inspiration. I shall work harder to be where I want to be, even if for now Im a bit confused.
Medical school seemed to be the straight path, it was there since almost six years ago, it seemed easy enough to do it, go to college get a bs in bio and then get accepted to UTUH, or UTDallas but now it seems foreign to me. I've discovered or rather accepted that I don't enjoy ordinary people, Id rather be off by myself than with a group of people and while my father says it's because Im insecure I think it's because I really can't stand most of the public anymore. Ignorance, rudeness, disregard for others, addiction, amorality, etc I leave it for those that can take it. I think Id rather be working on research to help eradicate malaria or develop a treatment for cancer or Alzheimer's. I dunno anymore about working with the public, perhaps my job at OD has put in a drop of bitterness in my blood or opened my eyes to what could be a mistake in the future. hm...
In other more exciting news, I have been on a movie marathon, Keeping Mum, is the funniest thing Ive seen in a while, its a dark comedy about a family that finds each other with the help of their maid Rosemary (Maggie Smith) who believe it or not fixes things by killing people. hahaha, and if Maggie Smith wasn't enough Kristin Scott Thomas is in it too, wow, she's such a great actress I keep reading about her ability to deliver emotion with her altering face and until you see it on film you understand what people talk about. The bloopers and the outtakes on the special features are hilarious, I could not stop laughing, especially the part where Dame Maggie Smith is ironing a random shirt and she says "whose is this?" hahaha.
Life as A House is poignant and Kevin Kline rocks, I used to hate him because of the mustache but since it's gone on this movie I was able to overlook it.
English Patient- classic (Ralph Fiennes is very attractive)
Un Air de famille - dude, the cast had been performing the play for like months before they made the movie, so it's magic watching them act.
The Devil Wears Prada- only reason I watched this is because Meryl Streep is in it, which pretty much saves the whole movie, not to say that its terribly bad or anything but I dunno, it's alright, a little bland.
Top Gear- it's not a movie but a british show about cars, and while I have no real interest in them I enjoy the humor, and some of the challenges are crazy like driving a twenty ton (i think that's how much it weighed) tractor on an extremely narrow wooden bridge across a swampy pond. hahaha, you see?
I've read about darwin, guns germs and steel, salammbo, and strangely enough Paris Match magazines, which makes me practice that rusty french.
Can you believe my bio prof does not believe in evolution? wtf?
but yet he believes in voodoo
and I quote
"if you don't have faith then how do you know someone can't put a curse on you?"
I feel awkward and somewhat left out of earlier friendships and maybe even recent ones. Most of them are on their way to internships or study abroad and yet I am in houston doing nothing really and feeling odd. GT is preparing for law school and many others are content in what they're going to do like this really cool guy I know is going to backpack in Europe for the summer, he knows no one there except a distant uncle in Germania and the dude is going there all by himself to experience these new things that come with growing a year older. And in all my happiness I hate feeling down and wishing that was me crap, im unfulfilled, but then again it gives me this thing I think I can call inspiration. I shall work harder to be where I want to be, even if for now Im a bit confused.
Medical school seemed to be the straight path, it was there since almost six years ago, it seemed easy enough to do it, go to college get a bs in bio and then get accepted to UTUH, or UTDallas but now it seems foreign to me. I've discovered or rather accepted that I don't enjoy ordinary people, Id rather be off by myself than with a group of people and while my father says it's because Im insecure I think it's because I really can't stand most of the public anymore. Ignorance, rudeness, disregard for others, addiction, amorality, etc I leave it for those that can take it. I think Id rather be working on research to help eradicate malaria or develop a treatment for cancer or Alzheimer's. I dunno anymore about working with the public, perhaps my job at OD has put in a drop of bitterness in my blood or opened my eyes to what could be a mistake in the future. hm...
In other more exciting news, I have been on a movie marathon, Keeping Mum, is the funniest thing Ive seen in a while, its a dark comedy about a family that finds each other with the help of their maid Rosemary (Maggie Smith) who believe it or not fixes things by killing people. hahaha, and if Maggie Smith wasn't enough Kristin Scott Thomas is in it too, wow, she's such a great actress I keep reading about her ability to deliver emotion with her altering face and until you see it on film you understand what people talk about. The bloopers and the outtakes on the special features are hilarious, I could not stop laughing, especially the part where Dame Maggie Smith is ironing a random shirt and she says "whose is this?" hahaha.
Life as A House is poignant and Kevin Kline rocks, I used to hate him because of the mustache but since it's gone on this movie I was able to overlook it.
English Patient- classic (Ralph Fiennes is very attractive)
Un Air de famille - dude, the cast had been performing the play for like months before they made the movie, so it's magic watching them act.
The Devil Wears Prada- only reason I watched this is because Meryl Streep is in it, which pretty much saves the whole movie, not to say that its terribly bad or anything but I dunno, it's alright, a little bland.
Top Gear- it's not a movie but a british show about cars, and while I have no real interest in them I enjoy the humor, and some of the challenges are crazy like driving a twenty ton (i think that's how much it weighed) tractor on an extremely narrow wooden bridge across a swampy pond. hahaha, you see?
I've read about darwin, guns germs and steel, salammbo, and strangely enough Paris Match magazines, which makes me practice that rusty french.
Can you believe my bio prof does not believe in evolution? wtf?
but yet he believes in voodoo
and I quote
"if you don't have faith then how do you know someone can't put a curse on you?"
posted by Els at
3:47 PM
